Forums / Community / Halo Universe

Halo Writing Workshop

OP Flugel Meister

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Caidos101 wrote:
Hey, So I am going through a writing phase, and am a huge halo fan, so I have written a small halo story and I hear this is the place to come for feedback.
I am sorry, but I am going to have to make multiple posts to get it all up.
For whoever critiques this, please dont be afraid to be brutally honest with the feedback.

There is one more page to upload but I hit the limit for posts today...so I guess a cliffhanger?
I will post the ending the minute I can
Please post via fanfiction.net and link to the story.

You should also ask specific questions regarding your writing.
Flugel, do you think experimenting with structure is viable in writing Halo, which is normally a linear narrative in-game? Is it viable anywhere? Also, what is an area of Halo lore you want to see expanded on that has really not been done before?
Flugel, do you think experimenting with structure is viable in writing Halo, which is normally a linear narrative in-game? Is it viable anywhere? Also, what is an area of Halo lore you want to see expanded on that has really not been done before?
Do you mean by the developers of personally?

Non-linear has already happened, and it certainly has its place. ODST is a superb game with a great story.

I'd like to see the more about the inner workings of ONI.
Hey, I wrote my first halo short fanfiction story, and posted part of it here yesterday (I sincerely apologise for spamming the forum.)
Here is the link to my full story on fanfiction.net
If anyone would like to read it and review it or give me some feedback that would be awesome :)

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12491963/1/Halo-Operation-Crie

Any feedback would be wonderful, but I have been informed that specific questions might be the way to go.

1. Obviously I would like to know if you enjoyed my story, if you did or did not please let me know why.
2. I think my writing of dialouge is really dry and I am not sure how to go about conversations, if you can offer some advice for the way my characters interact with one another that would be amazing.
3. How are my action scenes, I am really not sure where I stand on them.
4. Did you feel a connection with any characters at all, I am not sure if I built any of them up well enough. Joshua and Patrick were just extras but the other 4 squad members I tried to focus on a little.
5. Obviously just anything you think could use work

Hope you enjoy :)
Flugel, do you think experimenting with structure is viable in writing Halo, which is normally a linear narrative in-game? Is it viable anywhere? Also, what is an area of Halo lore you want to see expanded on that has really not been done before?
Do you mean by the developers of personally?

Non-linear has already happened, and it certainly has its place. ODST is a superb game with a great story.

I'd like to see the more about the inner workings of ONI.
Hmm I didn't find ODST that strong of a narrative. The end goal was weak, I think. I felt the whole thing was weak. Fun game to play though. Perhaps you can convince me otherwise lol?
What I meant was non linear writing like from the games' Life is Strange or Quantum Break. But maybe Halo games aren't meant for that style of writing.
Caidos101 wrote:
Hey, I wrote my first halo short fanfiction story, and posted part of it here yesterday (I sincerely apologise for spamming the forum.)
Here is the link to my full story on fanfiction.net
If anyone would like to read it and review it or give me some feedback that would be awesome :)

Lazy McLazylinkAny feedback would be wonderful, but I have been informed that specific questions might be the way to go.

1. Obviously I would like to know if you enjoyed my story, if you did or did not please let me know why.
2. I think my writing of dialouge is really dry and I am not sure how to go about conversations, if you can offer some advice for the way my characters interact with one another that would be amazing.
3. How are my action scenes, I am really not sure where I stand on them.
4. Did you feel a connection with any characters at all, I am not sure if I built any of them up well enough. Joshua and Patrick were just extras but the other 4 squad members I tried to focus on a little.
5. Obviously just anything you think could use work

Hope you enjoy :)
Link fixed
Caidos101 wrote:
Hey, I wrote my first halo short fanfiction story, and posted part of it here yesterday (I sincerely apologise for spamming the forum.)
Here is the link to my full story on fanfiction.net
If anyone would like to read it and review it or give me some feedback that would be awesome :)

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12491963/1/Halo-Operation-Crie
Any feedback would be wonderful, but I have been informed that specific questions might be the way to go.

1. Obviously I would like to know if you enjoyed my story, if you did or did not please let me know why.
2. I think my writing of dialouge is really dry and I am not sure how to go about conversations, if you can offer some advice for the way my characters interact with one another that would be amazing.
3. How are my action scenes, I am really not sure where I stand on them.
4. Did you feel a connection with any characters at all, I am not sure if I built any of them up well enough. Joshua and Patrick were just extras but the other 4 squad members I tried to focus on a little.
5. Obviously just anything you think could use work

Hope you enjoy :)
Link fixed
I am not sure how to fix it so you can click and follow it that way, but I have tested copy and pasting it and it works.
I hope that satisfies

I realise now you were fixing my link, and not asking me to fix it. Oh what a fool I am.
So I just discovered this thread and I think its cool. I have recently written a story (part of a trilogy-part 1 is done, currently on part 2) on fanfiction. It is quite long (over 160k words for part 1) hence the link. Like most of the people here, I think the Halo universe is a place rich in opportunities to explore, flushing out stories and characters to create something engaging and interesting. My novel (honestly at that length, it is) is a deviation from the (what I think) is the usual sci-fi setting. While it retains what that Halo-ish feel, I did venture into the romance territory, a surprising avenue in the Halo franchise.

Short overview: Since I did not like the Halo 5 story line (good plan, poor execution) I deviated from canon at the end of H4. A ODST is assigned to Blue Team and slowly a romance develops between Kelly-087 and this ODST as they try to take down the next threat against the UNSC. (Simple intro, story is obviously more flushed out). Also pokes into what civilian life could be like (you know, besides being slaughtered by the Covenant). If anyone wants to look at it and provide feedback on a few things, I would greatly appreciate it.
  1. My environments- see if you can imagine where the action is taking place and what atmosphere is created by these places.
  2. Action- see if the combat feels like Halo and if you can see the characters actually doing these things
  3. Romance- if it is believable, both in the sense of how it might naturally develop and if it could be realistic in the setting presented (setting of Halo as a militaristic sci-fi shooter)
  4. Dialogue- If my dialogue makes sense and carries the right tones for the setting/moment. Or if it rambles on
  5. Backstory- my ODST's backstory is interesting and believable
  6. Anything else you can think of
Enjoy my story!

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11685157/1/The-Rabbit-and-the-Wolfe

(Not sure how to make this into an actual link, sorry!)
I had forgotten all about this. But feel free to continue posting if you need writing advice.
Great timing. I have a question actually.
I'm trying a new way of putting my fiction together, which is to write character dialogue first. Something I always end up doing is spending too much time trying to paint and construct these elaborate descriptive settings, whereas I'm finding that if I do dialogue first, I can see everything more simplistically. Sure it means I'll have too much dialogue, but then I can pare that down when I fill the gaps with description, as opposed to vice versa.
This came from writing a letter - the future writing competition task you'd nodded to. I found it made portraying a realistic world much easier.
Any thoughts, advice, or watch outs?
Great timing. I have a question actually.
I'm trying a new way of putting my fiction together, which is to write character dialogue first. Something I always end up doing is spending too much time trying to paint and construct these elaborate descriptive settings, whereas I'm finding that if I do dialogue first, I can see everything more simplistically. Sure it means I'll have too much dialogue, but then I can pare that down when I fill the gaps with description, as opposed to vice versa.
This came from writing a letter - the future writing competition task you'd nodded to. I found it made portraying a realistic world much easier.
Any thoughts, advice, or watch outs?
Every writer has a different way of structuring their stories. Subsequently, what works for one writer won't necessarily work for another. So I'll impart how I get ideas and see if that helps your creative process.

  1. Get a rough idea running around in my head. This can be spontaneous or something that's steadily evolved over time.
  2. Play various scenes (not detailed or completely defined) over in my mind to get a better idea of the situation and circumstances involved.
  3. Writer down early scenes, not a complete story. Sometimes with dialogue, sometimes without.
  4. Bridge some of the scene together to form a more cohesive narrative. By now I'll have a basic plot, including the beginning and end. And some of the characters will have their own issues and concerns, making them more relatable.
  5. Structure additional scenes to provide more cohesion, exposition, plot etc.
  6. Revise and refine.
  7. 1st draft. Write the first draft. This is a rough draft of the complete story or perhaps the first few chapters.
  8. Leave for several days and read. This makes it easier to see it with a fresh pair of eyes. It also makes it easier to see mistakes, be it grammar, punctuation or plot, dialogue and exposition etc.
  9. Revise and refine.
  10. 2nd draft.
  11. 3rd draft
  12. 4th draft etc etc.
Each draft is a revised version of the former, and might feature new elements or have some parts completely removed if they weren't working.

If doing a novel length story, once I get to a certain stage I'll write out key events for each chapter as a short brief. This acts as a guide. Something needs to happen in each chapter and this method is useful for ensuring you're doing that. Each event or incident needn't' be something big. It just needs to be relevant and needed.

  1. Chapter 1: Protagonist wakes, alone and injured in London
  2. Chapter 2: Wife of protagonist realises her husband might be dead after the event
  3. Chapter 3: Protagonist wanders the dead streets of London, looking for any indication or clue as to what happened
And so on...

Hope this helps.
Every little helps man, thanks. Some in there I do and plenty I can add.
Whether or not the results bear this out, I found the latest competition much easier to write for. Having a strict word limit and setting, as well as the instruction to "know your characters" really helped, because it came down to a plan of how to bring out my characters' concerns through each other, in a limited amount of space.

I wrote one version, which was garbage. So I wrote a pretty much entirely new one, which I liked, but was 1,200 words. Refining those words really help trim out the fat (literally) and make the character angles more concise. I tend to over-elaborate so it was pretty liberating to wonder if it was too little as opposed to too much. Then on reading it over a few times and checking back with the criteria, I realised I had one character too many. Private Day was only a bit part player, but he had to get axed. This again made me focus in on whether his viewpoint was valuable, able to be subsumed by another character, or just a waste of words.

End result is a super-short story I actually enjoy reading back, which is nice. Learned a lot. Interested in anyone else's thoughts/experience.
Whether or not the results bear this out, I found the latest competition much easier to write for. Having a strict word limit and setting, as well as the instruction to "know your characters" really helped, because it came down to a plan of how to bring out my characters' concerns through each other, in a limited amount of space.

I wrote one version, which was garbage. So I wrote a pretty much entirely new one, which I liked, but was 1,200 words. Refining those words really help trim out the fat (literally) and make the character angles more concise. I tend to over-elaborate so it was pretty liberating to wonder if it was too little as opposed to too much. Then on reading it over a few times and checking back with the criteria, I realised I had one character too many. Private Day was only a bit part player, but he had to get axed. This again made me focus in on whether his viewpoint was valuable, able to be subsumed by another character, or just a waste of words.

End result is a super-short story I actually enjoy reading back, which is nice. Learned a lot. Interested in anyone else's thoughts/experience.
Writing several drafts is extremely useful and I'm glad you're finding helpful. It's all too tempting to post your first draft. But I can usually tell if that's the case with entries.
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